by alittlelove

I woke up before my alarm this morning.  The sky was just turning blue from pink.  Those are the best morning.  I’ve always liked sunrises better.

I sat there in my bed for a while.  Thinking about God..thinking about my family..then thinking about my friends.  I quietly uttered some prayers..then I opened my Bible.  I’m still in Numbers.  This morning I read about Korah.  I tried to imagine what it would be like for all those people to die.  It was hard.  Then I flipped over to Acts.  Remember Ananias and Sapphira(his wife)?  They tried to swindle God..didn’t work.  He caught them.  I tried to imagine what that was like.  Ananias comes in..drops dead..his wife come in later(not knowing what had happened)..drops dead.  I can’t imagine.  I’ve never seen anyone die.  I know it must have been horrid though.  I know it would have made me fear God a little more.

I sat there thinking.

Do I fear God enough?  where has my passion gone?”
I’ve lost a lot of my passion and zeal over the years.  I am not proud about that at all.

i’m sorry God.’

I whispered.

I don’t want to be like Korah and his followers..I want to be like Moses who fell on his face.  Have you ever noticed that?  Moses spends a lot of time on his face.  How much time do I spend on my face?  Zippo.

I don’t want to be like Ananias and Sipphira.  I don’t want to swindle God in any way.  I don’t want to die like they did.

I want to be the humble lowly Spirit-filled servant of the most high God.
I want to spend more time on my knees praying ‘Abba Father’
I want to follow Yahweh with reckless abandon..holding nothing my all.

These thoughts running through my mind..I hopped out of bed, wrapping a blanket around my cold shoulders, and walked into the kitchen. I think my passion is coming back.  I am ready to do whatever it takes to get it back…including spending copious amounts of time on my knees talking to my ‘Abba’ Father.

Then off to Bible study.  I played worship.   “Yearn”.  We sang that.  My heart melded with the words.  I really did yearn.  I still am..yearning to know God in the most beautiful intimate way.  I am thirsty for more of God.  I know He is going to hear my prayers.  I know He will draw closer.

Are you yearning for Him?