a love that is more than my lonely heart.
O my mind is whirring right now…I don’t know what, but I am feeling something so odd. I think I’m anxious but I feel completely content…I also feel like I have drank about 10 cups of cold coffee(but I haven’t had any today). I’m sitting here in the library wishing so madly that it would rain(which isn’t really a good wish, because I have to ride my bike home). I want so badly to dance in the rain, but dancing in the rain is quite lonely sometimes…maybe that is what I feel l.o.n.e.l.i.n.e.s.s. I feel bad for all the people who feel lonely. You know, I don’t think anyone should ever feel lonely, ’cause really, this is a horrible feeling. What is loneliness though? Is it a lack of something..or is it discontentment? I woke up this morning with complete love for Jesus. I WANTED so much to spend time with Him. So, I did…I prayed, I read, and then I sang…and I wasn’t lonely one bit, because I knew Jesus was with me. And.He.Forever.Will.Be. Why am I lonely then? Really, you have to understand…I do not so much experience this feeling(that is why I am writing about it), so it is quite odd for me. I think maybe part of it is the program is almost over. The people I have spent the last six months with are going to be gone, and most likely we are not going to see each other very much. It’s almost like a piece of my life is going to be missing. Which is quite a depressing thought, but I’m so intrigued by it. The LORD puts people in our lives for a season, and then He brings more people, and those people help shape our character…that makes me smile. It isn’t depressing at all…the LORD has a plan for each of our lives…and if it is for me to know three special people for six special months..then I will take that quite willingly. It is a completely marvelous thing to be in the will of God. I cannot begin to express His goodness to me. He is so very grand..
The LORD showed me something quite beautiful in my quiet time a few mornings ago…it was in psalm 29:
1Give unto the LORD, O ye mighty, give unto the LORD glory and strength.
2Give unto the LORD the glory due unto his name; worship the LORD in the beauty of holiness.
3The voice of the LORD is upon the waters: the God of glory thundereth: the LORD is upon many waters.
4The voice of the LORD is powerful; the voice of the LORD is full of majesty.
5The voice of the LORD breaketh the cedars; yea, the LORD breaketh the cedars of Lebanon.
6He maketh them also to skip like a calf; Lebanon and Sirion like a young unicorn.
7The voice of the LORD divideth the flames of fire.
8The voice of the LORD shaketh the wilderness; the LORD shaketh the wilderness of Kadesh.
9The voice of the LORD maketh the hinds to calve, and discovereth the forests: and in his temple doth every one speak of his glory.
10The LORD sitteth upon the flood; yea, the LORD sitteth King for ever.
11The LORD will give strength unto his people; the LORD will bless his people with peace.
Reading through this, I began to think about the voice of the LORD..if just His voice is powerful enough to do all that is above..then how much more powerful is His hand? If just His voice can create light, and life, and all creation…then how much more can His Hand uphold you in a time of trial? How much more can the Hand of God deliver you from loneliness, and sorrow, and death? How much more?
We serve an amazing God. Far beyond all that we could ever imagine. He is a glorious mystery. He is so worthy. I love you LORD with all my heart.
All glory to the King of Glory. Blessed be your name Jehovah.